How to forgive someone who inflicted pain or suffering upon us can be quite a daunting task for most people. I know that was the case for me when I needed to forgive someone whom I trusted deeply, and then I learned that he didn’t have my best interest in mind from the start.
Forgiveness is truly one of these things that’s easier said than done.
Sometimes the damage that has been done to us can lead us to seek revenge. And, from experience, I can tell you that seeking revenge does not get you anywhere good.
Being hurt by another person, especially someone who you might’ve loved or trusted can leave you in terrible shape.
From emotional stress to mistrusting ourselves to being overprotective over the simplest of things, it’s quite a vicious cycle.
Not to mentions the health implication if we keep holding on to the pain and not to practice the Art of Forgiveness.
I don’t know about you, but losing my health and wasting my time on past hurt, doesn’t sound like a very good recipe for a positive and optimistic life.
Dwelling over the past, and holding on to resentment can only breed bitterness into your heart and soul.
On the other hand, choosing to forgive someone can allow you to heal.
Practicing Forgiveness has many health benefits.
According to the Mayo Clinic, by forgiving someone, you can benefit from:
- Lowered blood pressure
- Decreased stress levels
- Reduced hostility towards events, people or environment
When you have been deeply hurt by someone, your overall emotion can range from resentment to pure anger, hate, and sometimes even rage.
Forgiveness can teach you how to practice more self-control over your emotions, which means you’ll increase your emotional intelligence in the process.
Whenever your emotions, especially anger or rage, get the best of you, do one of these 3 things. Or all of them if needed:
- Take 10 deep breaths
- Count from 0-10
- Channel the negative energy of anger or rage into something more productive like running or boxing
Trust me, that’s a better way to process anger than punching someone in the face and getting an unwanted assault charge from someone who deserved it in the first place.
Learn how to trust your gut and follow your intution!
Depending on how deep you have been hurt, it may take a lot of dedication to be able to give the person you resent your Forgiveness.
That is why I am going to share with you three helpful ways to help you practice the Art of Forgiveness so that you can take back your power.
3 Helpful Ways to Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You
Let’s get started. Shall we?
1. What does it mean to forgive?
First, let’s define forgiveness
Merriam-Webster defines forgiveness as the act of forgiving.
But for you to practice Forgiveness, you must first find out what it means to you?
How would you want someone to treat you if you made a mistake that you did not intend to do?
You have to keep in mind that we are only humans beings who are not perfect; therefore, errors are bound to happen.
Once you define what forgiving someone means for you, you will begin to learn to let the wrongdoing go instead of allowing it to fester.
The peace of mind that you will gain when you forgive someone is simply an act of self-love.
2. Find the importance of forgiveness
Even though we cannot touch or see it, Forgiveness is very real and powerful.
In fact, it is so powerful that the lack of forgiveness can turn the most loving person into the most cold-hearted.
Practicing Forgiveness is so important because it allows a person to regain their peace of mind and move on with their lives.
Keep in mind that Forgiveness does not mean you condone the wrongdoing, and you do not have to forget that it happened to you.
Just keep in mind that practicing Forgiveness brings an overall improved physical, mental and emotional wellbeing.
Unforgiveness has so many adverse effects on the body and can be a prison for the mind. Don’t allow a person to have that much power over you. They do not deserve it. Don’t let them hurt you anymore.
3. Ask questions in order to heal
Finally, to achieve the ability to forgive someone, you get to ask yourself questions as if the shoe was on the other foot. Doing this will allow you to understand what you have just experienced.
You get to ask yourself things like,
- What do I get by holding on to this resentment?
- How would an observer think about the overall situation?
- What can I learn from this situation?
You will also want to ask yourself what part did you play that lead to a harmful situation. That way, you will learn your lesson and not make the same mistake twice.
Once you have asked and answered these questions, you will realize that you are on the right track to growth and forgiveness.
Why not forgiving someone is bad news for you?
When you refuse to forgive someone and choose to hold onto grudges, you don’t release the pain.
In essence, you become imprisoned by the pain. Instead of doing this, take back your power and practice some forgiveness.
So, remind yourself of the importance of forgiveness and the adverse effects of refusing to forgive someone can have on you. Then ask yourself what is most important, hating someone who hurt you or your overall health and wellbeing? Which one is more important to me? I do not think you will find it hard to answer that question anymore☺️
Xoxo,
Soul
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